I was captivated by her movements, so feminine, so common and so… unfamiliar at the same time.
Until that moment I had not realized how much my own way of moving my body had changed. Always stylish with a collection of beautiful printed scarves in my closet… I was feeling pretty in spite of the disease.
The realization had a chilling effect on me, the cancer had indeed damaged my femininity.
At this very moment, I felt utterly ugly. All the women around me looked stunningly beautiful, their wet hair drying and curling naturally with this grace that only summer can create, all wearing swimwear carefully chosen, highlighting the color of their eyes, enhancing their silhouette, their plunging neckline, or the beautiful curves of their hips…
Suddenly my swimsuit was incredibly ugly and I felt ridiculous. My scarf clashed with it, I would not be able to get my head in the water, and even less to shake dry that hair that I did not have. I too wanted be able to do that movement above my shoulder and to tie my swimsuit around my neck, as I always had.
I wanted to behave like them all, as a woman. Certainly weakened but still feminine!
The entire charm of the holiday and the excitement and aspirations I had as I woke up that day had just vanished.
And this is at that very moment that Garance was born.
The realization that femininity had been damaged awakened the anger growing inside of me.
Why did it have to be that hard to feel like a woman after breast cancer? Why wasn’t out there a swimsuit that would make me feel pretty, a beautiful collection of swimwear that I could buy in the same store as all other women? I decided that no woman would have to live through that again.
I was going to fight to change things. So that fashion makes the lives of all women who went through or would go through the journey I had just gone through, better.
I had time, I may not have had loads of energy, but I wanted to do it. And so I did it.”